Arminda Lindsay

Being On Purpose

Fast Track Tip #3

By

Fast Track Tip #3

Curtain Rising

The auditorium was filled with a collective anticipation as the curtain rising revealed nine sequined bumblebees fidgeting in their leotards, buzzing to begin moving their newly-painted gold tap shoes to the well-rehearsed chords of the baby bumblebee song. It was the day I had anxiously anticipated for months and months, through all of our rehearsals and costume fittings and here I was: on the BIG stage.

Seated in the audience with my parents was also my Mom-Mom, my paternal grandmother, and she liked cats and monkeys, but I was nervous she might not be fond of bees. With each tap of my toe, hands firmly on my hips, I scanned the unseeable rows of seats for my people, certain that if Mom-Mom were there and I could see her seeing me, some magic might happen. What magic, I didn’t know.

And something magical did, indeed, happen, despite my not seeing anyone in the audience that night. As I tapped my way through the baby bumblebee song, arms and hands and head and feet all moving in rhythm and time to the beat, the anticipatory nerves and anxiety and fear of messing up my performance all lifted up and out of me, released into the nothing of dust particles scattering in the heat of the stage lighting. I WAS a bumblebee and I danced free — without nervous energy, or anxiety, or fear, or failure. I was pure bumbling joy and exhilaration.

After the performance when I did finally see my grandmother, she and I met each other in an embrace of bumblebee love and she gave me a slender glass vase that held three carnations (two pink, one white) and a tiny bumblebee, attached with wire to the stem of one flower, hovered just above the carnations.

Fast Track Tip #3

What I learned as a five-year-old bumblebee, I share with you now as the simplest method to increase your emotional well-being: just DANCE.

Skip, wiggle, do the Hokey Pokey, bring back the Electric Slide, or pick a decade whose dance moves resonate for you and duplicate them.

You don’t need a special someone watching from the audience. You don’t need an audience at all! This tip doesn’t even require gold-painted tap shoes, although if you’ve got a pair, definitely wear the tap shoes.

Spontaneous Dance Parties happen on the regular in my world.

Do a loony-goony dance
‘Cross the kitchen floor,
Put something silly in the world
That ain’t been there before. —Shel Silverstein, A Light in the Attic

And for your viewing pleasure, me: dancing.

Fast Track Tip #2

By

Fast Track Tip #2

I Was Raised On Music

I have no memories that don’t include music.

None.

My parents loved music of all genres and had a record collection that I’m sure would be the envy of many vinyl collectors today and there was always music playing in the background of my childhood.

As a little girl, I loved accompanying my dad to the Southern States Feed Store early on a Saturday morning before the sun had had time to take the edge off the leftovers from last night’s dark. We’d climb into his red Ford pickup truck and he’d cinch the middle seatbelt snugly around my waist before clicking his own in place.

Then with his right elbow always slightly bumping me as he shifted gears, my dad would sing. His was an audience of one open-eared adoring fan with long blonde hair pulled into two ponytails on either side of her head. I knew every word to every song in his repertoire: from all the campfire funny songs to my personal favorite, “Old Man River,” sung in my dad’s beautiful deep bass that I could never match as I sang along.

Everything was always right in my world when my dad sang out loud.

One night — long after my sister Melanie and I had been tucked into bed — the finale to Rossini’s William Tell Overture came crashing through our bedroom door and giggling with delight, Melanie and I snuck down the hall and into the kitchen, grabbed the broom and galloped through the living room riding the broom in our nightgowns and laughing so hard we fell off our “horse” and Dad laughed and applauded our interpretation of the piece before sending us back to bed.

Fast Track Tip #2

Buddy the Elf is the ideal example of how this tip works and its effectiveness. Buddy teaches us that “the best way to spread Christmas Cheer, is singing loud for all to hear.”

I’ll amend his wisdom in the interest of making this very important second tip usable year-round and irreligious:

The best way to spread inner cheer is singing loud for YOU to hear.

And in case you’re worried you can’t or don’t know how to sing, Buddy has some helpful advice for you: “. . . [singing] is just like talking, except longer and louder, and you move your voice up and down.”

There you go.

That’s your second of four fast track tips!

SING!!

Sing alone, sing along, join a choir, make up songs, create your own playlist for singing, sing to your children, perform for your dog, make your own microphone for car performances (and an extra to keep in the house), just sing.

Can you sing and be unhappy at the exact same time? Try it. I dare you. I double and triple dog dare you. Yes, I just went there.

You cannot remain emotionally low if you are singing. Fast track your emotional self up through song.

If you need one more “note” of encouragement, please watch my all-time favorite song about singing:

Emotional Drag

By

Is fear creeping in on you again? When you’re experiencing the physiological “side effects” of fear, what do you do? Do you inadvertently hold your breath? Do you stop eating consistently? Do you bite your nails? Do you phone a friend? Do you . . . ?

What if FEAR is wearing a mask to make you THINK it’s fear, but it’s not actually?

That sneaky fear. . . always playing tricks on us.

You should probably watch just to find out what my drag queen name would be!

Fast Track Tip #1

By

Fast Track Tip #1

Avocados Are Trouble

It started with the avocado incident; slicing open my own finger is always* laugh-worthy to me.

But it wasn’t until right after we two friends posed for the above super-imposed shot “in front of” the Empire State Building that I noticed it: a spray of blood just below the words, “I ❤ Hass” on my white t-shirt. Oh, how we laughed and laughed and waited in line to distract the sales rep while we took this contraband image of our own picture.

New York City never looked so funny to me as it did that night from the top of it all.

Fast Track Tip #1

When you find yourself at the bottom of your emotional ladder you might feel sad, frustrated, angry, lonely, resentful, hurt, overwhelmed, or judgmental.

Fast track yourself toward the top of your emotional ladder by laughing. Laugh intentionally. And laugh quickly. Find something that is guaranteed to put a smile on your face and do it immediately.

Some of my favorite easy laugh options include:

  1. YouTube videos — they’re short and convenient for a quick pick-me-up
  2. Talking on behalf of my dog, Eli — seriously one of the funniest things I do (just ask me)
  3. Skipping — I was the champion skipper ages five AND six, no small feat I assure you
  4. The paperboy from Crazy Off Dead
  5. And the paperboy from While You Were Sleeping
  6. Basically the entire movie Elf — or this brilliant line will suffice
  7. Also, the entire movie The Emperor’s New Groove, but especially the Smash it With a Hammer! scene
  8. Hilarious Gandalf intervention — only Lord of the Rings fans need click this one
  9. Dramatic readings by the Muppets — what’s not to love about the Muppets?
  10. Reading my own Happy List — I keep a written daily record of things that make me laugh, smile, and that cause joy, and I’ve been tracking this for decades now.

Take some time right now to jot down your known methods for inducing laughter, and the next time you find yourself down, go straight to your list to get yourself back up.

If we’re going to laugh about it later, we might as well laugh about it now. — Dr. Mary Hulnick, Ph.D.

*Don’t worry; I have many stories I won’t be sharing with you in this forum.

The Hustle

By

If you’re not hustling you’re not winning. Is that true? What is hustling, anyway? I want to suggest that what works (systems, programs, implementations, processes) for someone else may or may not work for you, but what will always work is for you to follow your commitment. If you’re committed, you’re “all in,” and when you’re “all in,” follow THAT commitment and you’ll know exactly what to do. That’s where the magic lies — inside of you.

Sell From the Top

By

Sell From the Top

Let’s play a little game of pretend. Picture with me that your emotional life is lived on a ladder.

If at the top of the ladder are joy and happiness, then you’ll find things like fear and obligation hanging out at the bottom.

In order to “win” this pretend game I just made up, you’ll need to be aware of some rules:

  1. Your objective is to move yourself as far up the ladder as possible
  2. The more time you spend in the top half of your ladder, the better you’ll feel toward yourself and toward others
  3. All of your interactions with clients (family & friends) will have the best outcomes if the other “players” are also as far up their ladders as possible
  4. The only person you can move up or down the ladder is yourself
  5. There are four fast tracks* to the top of the ladder; you are free to use any of them alone or in combination

The best sales advice I can give you is to sell from the top of the ladder. If you come from a place of fear and worry and needing the sale (bottom of the ladder), then your prospect intuitively knows it and won’t buy. Ever.

Move yourself up the ladder. Come from joy and pure service (not a variation on a theme of service) and you’ll astonish them every time.

*Four fast tracks:

  1. Laugh
  2. Sing
  3. Dance
  4. Serve 

Feeling Stuck

By

Feeling Stuck

Sometimes we feel stuck.

It’s completely and totally normal to feel stuck sometimes.

Please be kind to yourself if you’re looking down and experiencing stuck.

Please also don’t forget to remember that stuck is only temporary.

Here are some questions I like to use with a “stuck” client in our work to “unstuck” them and if they’re useful, please answer them for yourself.

Note: Before these questions can be useful for you, slow down your thoughts and don’t attach meaning to the feeling of stuck that you’re experiencing. It’s important that you not be in a place of judgement against yourself that “stuck” is bad and therefore nothing good can happen. Open yourself up to the possibilities these questions can provide for you as you answer them from the remarkable resource of your own resourcefulness and knowing.

  1. Is it true that you’re completely and totally stuck?
  2. From your vantage point, what do you see?
  3. Is there any benefit to this that you’re able to notice?
  4. How might you use this experience advantageously?
  5. Given your current situation, what resources or options might be available to you
  6. What would you like to create?

016: Gary Mahler & A Woman’s Sovereignty

By

GaryMahler

Gary Mahler & A Woman’s Sovereignty

The All Arminda Show

iTunes Button (via NiftyButtons.com)

Is it unusual that I’m bringing in a man to talk about women? Not this man, methinks 🙂

What can you look forward to learning?

The woman who knows her power and isn’t afraid of being and showing herself to the world — the world changes because of her

That value, sovereignty, inheritance resides within each of us — and only our stories get in the way

Unless and until I love and value myself, will I be the sovereign of my life and when I step into that value I will bless everyone around me because I don’t need them to be love because I already am love

Loving ourselves is such a deeply powerful experience and you’re the only one who can do it

How to Increase Your Power

  1. Notice what you do and who you be
  2. Choose different
  3. Take actionable steps to live the life you imagine
  4. Choose you

Future Vision Exercise

  1. List all the things you’re grateful for (read daily)
  2. Write personal “I am” statement (read daily)
  3. Live it

Choosing YOU

  1. This is who I say I am, now I only have to choose it
  2. Know your value
  3. Create your sovereignty
  4. Be around men who appreciate everything you bring
  5. Be who you need to be and you’ll attract the right sort of men

Gary references both Steve Hardison & Steve Chandler, remarkable men who have impacted countless lives with their love and service.

Gary’s Bio

Besides women’s surf retreats,  we create bespoke events for team building, leadership work, and executive groups: 3 day events in Malibu & 5 day events in Hawaii.

Gary works with highly-driven people to do that thing they want with all their heart, that thing they might not know how to describe yet. That thing that scares the hell out of them.

He challenges how his clients see themselves, think about themselves and believe in themselves.  Gary firmly believes and lives the principle: when you change the way you think about yourself and you change the way you behave, your life WILL transform. He will never, ever let you forget what you tell him is important to you. When you are ready, he’ll be your Life’s Purpose Operations Manager, building your dreams together.

Your Inner Lily

By

Your Inner Lily

Lily is a unicorn.

Lily likes to make things (like pickle fizzers and alien planet jumpers).

Lily likes making music and messes.

And Lily lives her belief that failing is only an opportunity to get back up again, that smiling is necessary, that traveling, exploring and making new friends are standard operating procedure, and that fun is waiting for her.

Only always.

What would you make, knowing pickle fizzers and alien planet jumpers have already been invented?

What music and messes are bottled up inside of you waiting to be unleashed?

What if failure is how you get there? What would that adventure look like in your world? Would you be collecting “No’s,” instead of “Yes’s”?

Smile — especially at the stuff that had you frowning yesterday.

Travel — to the ideas in your mind that excite you & keep imagining new ones.

Explore — ideas and options as if there are no bad or wrong ones.

Make new friends — particularly with someone you may not have noticed before today.

Create fun — because if you’re not having fun why are you doing it?

Always be a unicorn.

Always.

Decision Making

By

Do you believe your “decision maker” is broken?

When you don’t trust yourself to make decisions, you aren’t making any decisions because you’re not willing to make a choice for fear of risking making the wrong choice.

Full stop.

No decision is final and when you watch this video I’ll provide you with some different perspective on all the choices we get to make along the journey.

allarminda.com | 2024