Arminda Lindsay

Being On Purpose

Focus

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focus

Charles Fillmore suggests “There is an inherent law of mind that we increase whatever we praise. The whole of creation responds to praise, and is glad. Animal trainers pet and reward their charges with delicacies for acts of obedience; children glow with joy and gladness when they are praised. Even vegetation grows better for those who love it.”

But there’s a flip side.

What you focus on grows, whether that focus is on something praiseworthy and valuable, or whether on something unimportant and without merit.

When I water my plants, they flourish; when I neglect and disregard them, they become limp and lifeless.

The same principle also applies to our mindset, thoughts and behaviors.

During a recent conversation with the sweetest CNA I know, she told me she is really bad at taking blood pressure and because she’s so bad at it, she’ll never be able to advance her position into a different environment that would require her to regularly take patients’ blood pressure.

Her mindset in this situation is currently “fixed,” as she sees herself as good as it gets with no option for anything different.

Her thinking about herself is negative and comparative to others and she (mis)believes she’s incapable and less than.

Her behavior is resigned to where she is right now and because she can’t ever possibly take blood pressures differently than she does right now, she’ll always be working in a place where that’s not a daily requirement.

Up until our conversation she was focusing on what she can’t do (take blood pressure readings) and so she was simply creating a self-fulfilling prophecy. Plus, her fear and inhibition around the idea of being asked or required to perform this task were escalating.

I suggested a little game:

  1. Believe she’s capable of learning something new.
  2. Tell herself (out loud and at least once a day) she is great at taking blood pressure!
  3. Create regular opportunities to practice taking blood pressure.
  4. Update her resume in anticipation of a new working environment in which she will be using her amazing blood pressure taking skills!

What you focus on grows.

Focus on what you want to grow.

Now go bloom.

Practice creates talent.” — Steve Chandler

Loving you,
arminda

Commitment?

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commitment

When I want a drink, I don’t hesitate and question my commitment to quenching my thirst.

I just sip and swallow until I’ve emptied my glass.

Easy.

I’m all in without question or hesitation.

My actions become instinctual as I go through the motions, no longer questioning purpose, intent, focus, or motive. I’m just doing it because I decided to do it.

Commitment is easy like that.

My colleague Chris Dorris recorded a fabulous audio program on the subject of commitment and he gave me permission to gift it to you. If you’re committed to listening, please send me an email: coach@armindalindsay.com and let me know you’re all in, and I’ll send you the link.

I also recommend you watch the Ask Arminda video I recorded on this same subject of commitment.

Are you all in?

 

To Lunch or Not To Lunch

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Before you know the difference between being a “pro” and an amateur, you wonder about how you spend your time during your business day. A lot of colleagues and/or “others” are lunching together and so you think that’s what professionals do: they lunch. The question is never whether to accept a lunch invitation. The question is whether to turn pro. I reference Steven Pressfield‘s book, Turning Pro, and highly recommend you read it! I also reference the personal versus your professional self video.

Throw the Punch

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ThrowthePunch

I walked onto the mat this morning with wrist wraps securely in place, gloves at the ready, anticipating a solid hour of mitt and bag work under the direction of my trainer. I had been looking forward to this hour all week, for the chance to solely focus on myself in relationship to my imaginary opponent, furthering my ability to act — if needed — on automatic.

I have never used myself as a weapon to intentionally inflict harm or to cause injury against another. I have never hit another human being (not counting that time with my little brother).

Until today.

Today my trainer put on full headgear and told me I had to hit him. Really hit him — full on in the face.

Throw a straight jab at me, Arminda. Use your right; it’s stronger. Don’t hold anything back. You’re not going to hurt me. You have to know what it feels like and you have to know you can hit another human with intention. All the work we do will never matter if you can’t do this. Come on. Do it.

I wasn’t sure if I was going to burst into tears or vomit as my stomach turned uncomfortably. My sweaty palms transmitted their obvious reservation through the layers of wraps and gloves. An uncomfortable confusion clouded my thinking and as I hesitated between left and right foot placement I remembered to bring my gloves to my face and with the gentle touch of the right glove on my chin my left foot immediately followed suit and found its grounding forward position and I jabbed.

That was good! Now you know you can do it and you’ll always remember how that feels.

“I held back,” tumbled out of my mouth as the aftershock of relief flooded my entire body.

Hit me again, then. This time don’t hold back. And this will be the last time I ever invite you to hit me.

My focus was fiercely clear. I did not hesitate once I was in position to strike. I threw the punch.

And in that moment my fear and I came to an understanding: I throw the punches.

Focus

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We all like to hear about success and to see others succeed. But what about ourselves? What does it actually take to succeed? Is there a magic bullet? Super coach Steve Chandler said, “Success comes from focus. Winners focus.”

And Richard St. John corroborates that statement in this brief TED Talk on the power of focus.

allarminda.com | 2024