Arminda Lindsay

Being On Purpose

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Willing to Bloom

July 18, 2016 By Arminda

Willing to Bloom

Nothing in the universe thinks there is anything wrong with you. 
— Robert Holden, Ph.D.

I love living into my magnificence and supporting others in their desire to do the same in their lives. Those “others” are my loved ones: my family, friends, neighbors, clients, workshop participants, retreat attendees, readers of my articles, viewers of my videos, vendors, store clerks, peers, classmates, followers on social media, and anyone with whom I come in contact.

What does it mean to live into your magnificence? To be exceptional? It means you are open to continuous expansion of self and that expansion is achieved through a willingness to surrender your belief system, to be open to another story, another possibility, to be vulnerable.

How do you commit the surrender? You expose your old stories, one at a time, and write new ones. You own your vulnerability. You face your fears. You make courageous self-honoring choices rather than constantly seeking to please those around you. You see that you cannot possibly be in service to others without first being willing to be in service to yourself.

“Can you see what’s really happening here? You are the actor in your own story, but you are acting as if your story about you is a biography, not an autobiography.” 
— Robert Holden, Ph.D.

What does this surrender look like? 

  • not resisting
  • not defending
  • not justifying
  • not hiding
  • not puffing
  • not pretending
  • not covering up
  • not excusing
  • not deferring
  • choosing YOU

Dr. Brene Brown teaches that “vulnerability is our most accurate measure of courage.” This living into magnificence takes courage, for it is a scary thing to face your fears. Why is that, you might wonder? Because fears cover up our deepest hurts and if our deepest hurts were to be exposed, well, that might be embarrassing, or painful, or lonely, or true, or all of the above! In fact, you might fear the greatest fear of all: that you’re not lovable or worthy.

“The real you is not afraid of love, because the real you is made of love.”
—Dr. Robert Holden

Dr. Ron Hulnick suggests that the easiest way to overcome a fear is to do the very thing that scares you while fully in your fear of doing it!

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that frightens us most. We ask ourselves, ‘Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and famous?’ Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that people won’t feel insecure around you. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in all of us. And when we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” (Marianne Williamson)

Step into your fears. You are courageous. Liberate yourself from its grasp on you. Believe in your own magnificence and not in your limitations. Be willing to blossom. One petal at a time.

Loving you,
arminda

Filed Under: Blog, Weekly Wisdom Tagged With: Brene Brown, choices, fear, growth, happiness, joy, Ladder of Consciousness, life choices, live your life, love, Marianne Williamson, personal growth, possibility, purpose, Robert Holden, Ron Hulnick

Sell From the Top

March 14, 2016 By Arminda

Sell From the Top

Let’s play a little game of pretend. Picture with me that your emotional life is lived on a ladder.

If at the top of the ladder are joy and happiness, then you’ll find things like fear and obligation hanging out at the bottom.

In order to “win” this pretend game I just made up, you’ll need to be aware of some rules:

  1. Your objective is to move yourself as far up the ladder as possible
  2. The more time you spend in the top half of your ladder, the better you’ll feel toward yourself and toward others
  3. All of your interactions with clients (family & friends) will have the best outcomes if the other “players” are also as far up their ladders as possible
  4. The only person you can move up or down the ladder is yourself
  5. There are four fast tracks* to the top of the ladder; you are free to use any of them alone or in combination

The best sales advice I can give you is to sell from the top of the ladder. If you come from a place of fear and worry and needing the sale (bottom of the ladder), then your prospect intuitively knows it and won’t buy. Ever.

Move yourself up the ladder. Come from joy and pure service (not a variation on a theme of service) and you’ll astonish them every time.

*Four fast tracks:

  1. Laugh
  2. Sing
  3. Dance
  4. Serve 

Filed Under: Blog, Coaching, Weekly Wisdom, Writing Tagged With: choices, fear, happiness, joy, Ladder of Consciousness, Melissa Ford, obligation, sales, worry

Crazy Good

October 12, 2015 By Arminda

crazy good

I can’t get enough of Steve Chandler. I read all of his books. I listen to all of his audio programs. I participate in his live events. I pay him to coach me.

Steve just published a new book: Crazy Good.

This book is — as its title suggests — crazy good!

Chandler is a master of simplification. His is a gift for seeing patterns that most of us use as crutches and excuses for the why we behave the way we do (and oftentimes why we don’t actively participate in our lives at all) and then he shows us that another — better — option exists.

But only every time.

Seeing these distinctions leads us to choice. When we choose something different we place ourselves on the path to a crazy good life, not just a life lived to get through it all.

Be a joy-giver in your own life and read this book; you’ll be crazy glad you did!

Filed Under: Blog, Coaching, Weekly Wisdom, Writing Tagged With: crazy good, joy, joy giving, life distinctions, live your life, love your life, Steve Chandler

Happiness Crusade

October 23, 2013 By Arminda 1 Comment

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On February 13, 2012, I started a 21-day “dopamine challenge” here on this blog titled Creating Positive. Many of you joined me in that initiative (and it’s not too late to get started) because happiness is year-round and a lifetime journey. While there have been many changes in my life since I first penned that post, one thing is for sure: my heart is still full of gratitude. It’s so full that I keep writing out more and more. My list is growing and I’m filling up notebooks. Pages and pages of things for which I’m grateful and/or that make me smile and bring me happiness. My list is very personal and unique to my life, as is your list. This is the reason I can pick up one of my notebooks and open to any page and start reading through my list and immediately begin to smile as I am instantly transported to another day, place, and moment in time that ignited a spark of joy in my heart.

gratitude |ˈgratəˌt(y)o͞od|
noun
the quality of being thankful; readiness to show appreciation for and to return kindness

happiness |ˈhapēnis|
noun
the state of being happy

Shawn Achor (whose TED Talk inspired me to start my own challenge) writes in his book The Happiness Advantage that

“. . . our attitudes and behaviors don’t only infect the people we interact with directly — like our colleagues, friends, and families — but that each indivdual’s influence actually appears to extend to people within three degrees. So when you. . . make positive changes in your own life, you are unconsciously shaping the behavior of an incredible number of people. . . . [T]here are nearly 1,000 people within three degrees of most of us. This is a true ripple effect — by trying to make ourselves happier and more successful, we actually have the ability to improve the lives of 1,000 people around us” (p201).

That’s empowering. To me, at least. And I love that by embracing the life I live I have the potential within me to positively impact the lives of thousands of other people. Thousands.

I can’t wait for happiness to find me like some elusive carrot forever dangling at the end of its proverbial stick. You will never reach it if that’s your aim. Your “I’ll be happy when _________ ” will forever evade you.

“Waiting to be happy limits our brain’s potential for success, whereas cultivating positive brains makes us more motivated, efficient, resilient, creative, and productive, which drives performance upward” (Achor 4).

Motivation? Efficiency? Resilience? Creativity? Productivity? Yes, please!

Happiness is now. Happiness is your choice. Happiness is within you.

Come on my happiness crusade and create positive in your life today, tomorrow and always! Will you join me?

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Filed Under: Blog, Coaching, Happiness, Writing Tagged With: dopamine, Gordon B Hinckley, gratitude, happiness, happiness crusade, Happy List, joy, Shawn Achor, The Happiness Advantage

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